Metafictional Romance

Metafiction plays an important role in life and particularly in love. My dissertation dealt with the matter of the way in which people look to stories on living out their lives. I will thus discuss the way in which fiction/imagination influences love. 

I have been thinking for the past few days on past "loves" of my life and pondering over the way in which I fell under their spell. 

There was this cute little boy in the second grade, whom I had a crush on, based partly on a decision I made to have a crush on him. He was so very adorable, with black hair and a curl at the back of his head. I had fun in my crush on him throughout the year. I would tell my family every day about whatever interactions I had with him. I remember that one day, my Dad even told me a story about him! There was also this time during recess when we were playing the jump rope game, "Down by the valley, where the green grass grows." When it was my turn to jump rope, I was so excited to find out the boy that they would name to "come and kiss Padmini on the cheek." I was really hoping that that boy would be the one that I liked. Unfortunately, the bell rang for the end of recess, before they could name a boy for me...

Another metafictional romance for me was during the eighth grade in boarding school in India. I had come from one world in the United States where tweens dated for a day and then split to a world in India in which boys and girls did not even talk to each other. However, their form of romancing was fictitiously pairing a boy with one girl and teasing them about their "romance." I had a guilty pleasure in that game! At first, people told me, "You're so lucky that no one is teasing you, Padmini." I actually felt quite unfortunate since I would love to feel the butterflies and sparks from being teased! I was then delighted when people started to tease me with the very boy that I crushed on!

I was quite surprised to find that when I came back to high school in the United States, my classmates there--in the US, at that!--started up the game for me. One guy in my class and I were teased together for supposedly "liking" each other. I do not have much of an idea of where that came from. Regardless, I just loved being teased with that guy. I would act on the outside that I hated it, but was actually thrilled & chilled on the inside! It was the highlight of my high school days. 

Then there was another guy who was everything that I dreamed of. The more that I got to know him, the more that I found that he was everything that I dreamed of, which built up my love for him. Just like me, he wished that life could be like fiction and was always living in a fantasy world! He & I would have deep, poetic conversations on specific fiction and comparisons of our lives to that fiction. 

In one acting workshop that I attended, I had a scene partner with whom I did several romantic scenes. It actually turns out that in acting, you really have to feel the emotions that you enact, rather than faking them. So I eventually got to feeling real feelings for this guy through the scenes that we enacted together. I eventually got past that, however. Thank God!

I was having a discussion with someone who mentioned that she thinks that actors should not marry because of these complications that arise when blurring the boundary between life and art. I hope, however, to overcome those complications to do the right thing at the right time. 

There are also wonderful examples in fiction of metafictional love turning into real love. In Much Ado About Nothing by William Shakespeare, two "enemies," Benedick and Beatrice fall in love with one another when they are manipulated to think that the other is in love with them. In La Princesse Lointaine by Edmond Rostand, Jaufre Rudel falls in love with the Oriental princess, Melissinde, when he hears descriptions of her in poetry. In The Faerie Queene by Edmund Spenser, Britomart falls in love with an image of Artegall when seeing him in a Magic Mirror. The Before movie trilogy is a perfect example of a love that is a balance between spontaneity and self-conscious construction. 

Metafictional influence also plays a significant role in real life. Sometimes, there are two people that look to be perfect for one another. Then they are influenced to date or even marry because everyone says that they should be together. The relationship may or may not work out. I remember that there was this one girl, whom I really admired. I will call her Priscilla. She was the most beautiful girl in one social circle that I was involved in. She and this other guy, whom I will call Ray, were placed together in many same categories and so everyone thought that they should date. They did date, but the relationship just lasted for a very short period of time. As I admired Priscilla, I tried to think of whom she would be paired best with in that social circle and came up with a nice guy, whom I will call Sam. I even mentioned to Sam and Priscilla to date each other since they would go well together. It turns out that they did end up dating (I am not implying that it is or is not due to my suggestion) and even marrying!

I am all for utilizing imagination and fiction for romance. I have written to Juliet to seek answers to romantic questions. 

I always joke that I will make the perfect guy for myself out of gingerbread, but only if he would not run away from me...

As the lyrics from the Hindi song, "Meri Mehbooba" translate, please step out of the picture from my mind and come to real life!